Don't accept the gift of a verbal abuse!

“Anger is never without a reason, but seldom with a good one." - Benjamin Franklin

Being yelled at is never a pleasant experience. When someone raises their voice at you, it is normal to feel frightened. I have heard people say that they get angry on someone they love. Does that mean anger is synonymous to love? Or is it the other side of love? I believe none of them. People are angry when they aren’t at peace with themselves and try to dump their frustrations on someone who cares for them because that is the easiest resort for such people.  When you love someone, you accept them for what/ who they are and not put any terms and conditions, you talk softly, you try to put across your point in a low tone; shouting should be a ‘BIG NO NO’.  Anger immediately creates distance between two individuals. It creates a vacuum in the heart of someone who is on the receiving side. Yelling/ shouting at someone you love induces fear in their mind since the brain reads yelling as ‘DANGER’. People need to deal with their anger management issues themselves rather than finding an easy way to pour it on someone and spoiling their mental peace. One should never accept the gift of verbal abuse; the gift should belong to the giver. It’s not always true that couples, who fight the most, love each other the most. So all the people who say “anger” is a way of expressing love, kindly choose better ways. Be human and treat someone the way you want others to treat you!

My Man!!

I want a man who understands himself, more than he understands me. He who is aware of his shortcomings and accepts them as well. I can not change the man I marry, but anyone can change if they want to. I need a man who helps me find the courage to change the things I can. I just don't want to grow old with the man I love, I want to evolve with him. I want a man who understands that I am sensible and responsible enough to take care of myself, my husband and our family and does not doubt it even once. Someone who will understand that loving people needs energy, and it always helps if your better half becomes an equal part of it. I need someone who does not expect me to make efforts to look good for him, but compliments me when I do, so that it makes me happy to do so for him. I need someone who understands that like him, even I am not ready for marriage and all the things that come with it, and hence even I can go wrong or hurt him or someone close to him, but he must trust that it is unintentional, and give me a fair chance to make up for my mistakes. I want someone who fights over little issues, but does not let these little things come in the way of our love or care for each other. I know despite all things being good, there can be a ' what if' and I would be happy if my man had these doubts… because then I would find a reason to make efforts and let him realize that out of all the love stories he could have been a part of, this one would have been the most heartfelt.

I may not be politically correct.. But I am "SIMPLE and STRAIGHTFORWARD".!

Dear Blog,

I know I can vent out my feelings penning down here but I refrain myself from doing that. I am usually the silent types and the other times I simply try to ignore things. I feel like muttering something but I am not able to do so most of the times. Know why..?? I don't remember last time when someone close understood what I am trying to convey. I think the world today is so superficial that you should know how to put forward your thoughts in a rosy way. But I being a simple, straightforward person don't know how to express myself using the right words which others want to hear. It is always better to avoid an argument than to begin it. There is something about myself that I love and that is my simplicity but I don't think this quality is much appreciated in today's world. You should learn how to be politically correct or learn how to use proper adjectives, otherwise you end up becoming a fool. Times have changed and they urge me also to change but I cannot, I simply CAN'T. I try to manage a SMILE on my face when I am dying deep inside.

Things for me have changed enough and they are no longer same as they used to be. The very next day when I entered the wedlock, from being a daddy's li'l girl, I became a BIG girl. Life has been moving so very fast ever since then. The person who was treated like a small kid now had all the responsibilities of wife, daughter-in-law, sister-in-law, maami, chaachi to name a few. But in all the rush, many a times people forget that a girl who had always since birth held responsibilities of a daughter/ sister can't become proficient enough in delivering each and everything. It takes time to understand things, culture, family and more importantly everyone's expectations. I might not have met everyone's expectations but I just want to understand that trying to meet them doesn't matter at all??

Being at the age of '25' when you're just too young to understand the complexities of life, I held an important position at my workplace, I was admired and appreciated by people who were older than me. With my hard work, tireless worth ethic; in no time I made a mark for myself in the organization. I never tried manipulating things even at workplace as I have a strong belief of doing things in a simple way and make everyone's life easy. When you're active in all the activities at workplace and suddenly your activities come to a halt, it really bring jitters. My mind was not tuned in a way that I'll have to wait for 7-8 months to be able to start working again. After coming to US, when I thought I can position my resume in the job market; I was told about the rules, regulations and policies in detail. This gave me a BIG setback as I always thought of joining a job immediately after wedding. Its feels so frustrated to be sitting at home doing all the monotonous activities and on the top of it when no one appreciates you for the work done, you're bound to break down.

Being a girl, I am not allowed to express my opinions/ feelings freely, I am not allowed to ask any questions, I am not allowed to get angry, even if I am emotionally deep hurt inside; I am bound to keep a "BIG" smile on my face because I am a robot or a machine and not a human being. I am tuned in to do what others want/ like me to do. It really kills me when I get such treatment because of no fault of mine. I can't even discuss my frustration with anyone because that would not be taken care of and I'll again be accused of not talking properly/ not behaving the way a girl should. If people have to put labels to whatever the girl says, why do they desire a life partner. Life partner is your soul mate which means "the other you"- the one with whom you can share your deepest feelings without any fear or doubt of being judged, the one with whom you take vows of spending your life in happiness and in pain, the one with whom even if you argue or your point of view differs, you know that person will be there for you through all odds and is your significant other. In the hustle bustle of life, people start taking you for granted and treat you the way you shouldn't be treated.

How would you feel if some body who should be lifting you up when you're down always demotivates you and at the end says 'Don't worry, I'll be there at your back always"! Why is it that these words hold true in good times but not when you're going through a rough phase of life. When you're just starting to know each other, if somebody comments on your skin tone; how would you really feel? This notion had been made very clear in my mind that it is just the looks and the skin tone that you carry matters. People like you if you've flawless looks! Being from a simple family, where people think that the world is much above your appearance and inner soul and beauty is all that matters, my dressing sense was just too casual unlike the girls of my age who gave their best shots to look hip-hop by applying layers of makeup. I was all this time getting into the inferiority complex of not being liked by people because I did not have that X-factor in me. My notions were getting stronger by each passing day as I used to listen one or two comments about my skin and looks.  But I think because I had my family support and also work used to keep me engaged that I kind of started ignoring the comments made on me. The exposure to the new challenges at workplace was creating a new me where I knew that I had something that most of the people lagged! That was my sense of 'observation, interpretation' and my 'intellect'. I was scoring high on "the being sensible" than most of the lasses around. 

How do you rebuild that similar confidence in you when almost each day you're taunted for no or little fault of yours and when you're demotivated to the extent that your life loses its meaning for you. Whom do you talk to? The people who claim to be by your side but walk away when you really need them ? You don't have anyone with whom you can speak your heart out. The frustrated feelings get piled up in the heart and make you feel that there is no meaning to life after the milestone of life called "getting married".

Bachelor life is so much fun. Being mature enough to know when you have to act immature. Not regretting the mistakes you did but regretting when you were caught for them. Living in your own dream castle and getting the reality bites. Crying over once bitten by them. Getting family support even when you know deep inside that you are not very right. The fact is one is lost in his/ her own small world and look out for all the possible reasons to smile! Happy Smiles and a Happy Life! :)

Such is life, you can not go back and relive it. You have to constantly keep looking forward for the new milestones the life has to offer. Being strong is the only choice that you've and its well said ' When the times are rough, even your loved ones will never understand you', so I think when the times will get brighter; the things will start falling in place. Never leave the hand which you hold once and never treat others the way you don't want to be treated.

Battle between heart and mind!

Its been quite a long time since I penned anything. Not because I had nothing to write down but life has been taking many new turns each day- some good and few not so good. I stepped into a new chapter of my life which in girl's life is called 'settling down'. Being settled for a girl is getting married.


In this topsy-turvy of life, mind keeps hovering to find answers of things that some times matter a lot but the heart as always steps up and stops saying "move with the flow" and all will be well.  I always surrender the pen and ink to heart thinking it will never lie and will lead me to the right direction.


But the real game begins when between the battle of heart and mind, mind wins and smiles/ teases you mightily as if wanting to say "get practical- you emotional fool". World is not the way you see it. You see colors of love, honesty, affection, truth, joys in this world but actually it is black and white.

Is 'being truthful' so tough that people whom you love whole-heartedly are the only ones that end up playing with your feelings? I think being 'fake' is the new fashion and everyone seems to be in trend. 


I am sure mind might temporarily win and laugh at me but in the end it will be the HEART who will win the final battle. Heart can not lie, it just CAN NOT lie.! 

Wish you were here right beside me..!! :( :(

It's the end of the day and I was thinking about you, as usual. Ever since you have entered my life, I've been flying on Cloud 9 and I have not come down yet. As the days go by, I stop and think about all the memories we've made, the good times we've shared and the love between us that keeps growing. I want you to know how much I sincerely love the times we spend together. It means so much to me. It truly seems like I've known you forever and I honestly can't imagine life without you now. 

I miss you, I really do. Even though I see you everyday, am virtually with you at every moment, yet still I miss you. And when you think about it, how could you possibly miss someone constantly in your thoughts, in your dreams and in your fantasies? I guess I still can't believe that you're not here with me now at this moment ... God I'm missing you so very much!

There are no words that can possibly explain how I feel right now, because in fact, I've never felt this before ... sounds so cliché doesn't it? But that's a fact that I can never hide just like the blush on my cheeks ...

Sometimes you ask me why and how much do I love you and I don't answer just because I don't know where to start. Our love was meant to be. You surely are my best friend and a blessing from above - one that I do not take for granted and you surely have no idea how much of my heart you hold in your hands.

I don't know when you'll read this; it doesn't really matter though, you're mine and that's what counts. Love you so much..!!

Missing You..!!

Just 2 months ago my life was not the same,

I was looking for someone, who was always there…

Few phone calls and one meeting took my heart away,

Then you had to leave and the longer you could not stay…

I miss the way you looked me in the eyes,

I miss the way you laughed, talked and smiled,

I miss the way you said you love me,

I miss being together so that we’re never apart,

Come back soon so that we give our life a lovely start..!!

Happiness..!!

Happiness is what makes me feel warm inside...

Everything that makes me go crazy is considered my happiness

Gazing the stars in the night

Cool winter breeze

Sparkly raindrops

Walking in the rain

Cuddly teddy bear

Dazzling ear rings

The dress I wear

The gift from a loved one

The ice-cream in my hand

The stroll with my mum

The hug from my dad

The kiss to my pet

The chat with my friends